10+1 things girls say often

When it comes to the language center of the brain, women’s brain works differently than men’s. On an average, women speak at a rate of 250 words per minute, while men average half of that. In the course of a day, a woman will speak some 20,000 words, while guys utter just about 7,000. This is why the husbands sometimes struggle to keep focused on what the wives are saying.

Girls love to talk. A girl can visit her friend for two weeks, and upon returning home, she will call the same friend and they will talk for three more hours.
Silence intimidate girls and they feel a need to fill it, even if they have nothing to say.

For girls, talking is a priority and breathing comes second.
 

Here are 10+1 things girls say often

 

 

 

1. Sab Kuch Karenge Par Shaadi Ke Baad:  This is the deadliest arrow a girl can shoot. This arrow penetrates guy’s penis and he instantly becomes Bobby Darling. If a girl says “Sab Kuch Karenge Par Shaadi Ke Baad”, then be prepared to see her holding some other guy’s hand very soon.
This phrase either means she is not completely into you, or it means previously many guys had Looto-fy her izzat and left.

If the girl doesn’t allow the guy to screw her, then the guy is screwed.

2. Ladko Ko Toh Bas Ek Cheez Chahiye:  This theory has travelled down centuries by aunties who either never got laid like Dolly Bindra, or got laid too often like Savita Bhabhi.

I don’t understand why do girls always say that the guys need only one thing from them? Kya hai woh cheez, aaj bata he do.... Girls, you took our name, you took our clothes, you took our style, our hairstyle, our drinking habits etc. and all we ever took was a hole, aur tum bura maan gayi... Kya yaar!

"The one thing that every guy wants is TRUE LOVE."     Do you girls have that to give?

3. Ladkiyon Ka Purse Khol Kar Nahi Dekhte: Okay. Girls, let me make one thing very clear. Every guy on this freaking earth knows that you girls carry sanitary pads in your purse. It’s not a hidden secret, anymore. So, don’t get all hyper when a guy touches your purse. We’re not going to take out your Whisper and use it as a poocha to wipe the floor.

So, CHILL!

4. Mere Phone Ko Haath Mat Lagao: Apparently, there are so many secrets stored in a girl’s mobile that it will put Swiss Bank to shame. If you touch your girlfriend’s phone, she will snatch it back faster than Salman Khan removes his shirt.

Guys, let me solve the mystery of a normal Indian girl’s mobile phone.

If you remove the back cover, you might find a second SIM card. Some even hide it beneath the battery. If you check the 'Call history' you’ll see calls from unknown numbers which lasted for hours, and if you check the time of the calls you will be saddened to discover that the calls were attended after she told you she is about to sleep. If you check the 'Images' folder, you might find her naked pictures, but you never know who else you’ll see in the picture. Be prepared for a surpise.
Check her phone 'Messages' only if you’re not a heart patient.

So, gist of the matter is, never touch your girl’s mobile phone.  NO NO NO       NEVER  ji  NEVER

“Touch me but don’t touch my phone”  is 21 century’s mantra for a stable relationship.

5. Mein Iss Type Ki Ladki Nahi Hoon:  Uffffff!!!!! Ek toh mujhe aaj tak ladkiyon ki type he nahi pata chali.

You try to kiss her, she will say à ‘Mein Iss Type Ki Ladki Nahi Hoon’
You ask her out for a movie  à ‘Mein Iss Type Ki Ladki Nahi Hoon’
You send her a so-called ‘Non-Veg’ joke, she will LOL, forward it to her friends, and message you back saying, ‘Mein Iss Type Ki Ladki Nahi Hoon’
You try to talk dirty, she goes à ‘Mein Iss Type Ki Ladki Nahi Hoon’
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And finally, if you ask her for marriage, then also she will say, à “Mein Iss Type Ki Ladki Nahi Hoon”.

                                             W                               T                                F
 

 

 
6.  Ab Tum Pehle Jaise Nahi Rahe:  For the sake of 330 million Indian gods, please tell me what do girls mean by this!

A girl first asks her guy to start coming home early. Then she commands him to stop drinking, stop going out with his friends, start watching Saas-Bahu soaps with her, stop farting, stop scratching his crotch publicly, stop eating with open mouth, start bathing daily, stop watching porn, etc.  And when the poor guy adapts to all these changes, then she simply says, “Ab Tum Pehle Jaise Nahi Rahe” and finds another guy…… and starts changing him too.

#BhenDiShiki

7. Sab Ladke Ek Jaise Hote Hain: Girls, you’re right on this. This is how God made us. Every guy is same. Everyone got one penis, two testicles, one butt divided into two, one heart to be broken repeatedly, two hands to work hard for his woman, two legs to run around and do the best for his family, one stupid brain to believe that his girl is best in the world, and one mouth to keep shut in front of her.

Yes, every guy is same.

8. Mujhe Kiss Karna Nahi Aata: Obviously girl, your lips are made for much bigger jobs, like BL**JOB!

9. Mujhe Aisi Baatein Pasand Nahi: Aisi baatein!!! Kaisi baatein?
Aapko so called aisi baaton ka matlab pata hai, par pasand nahi. Matlab pehli aisi baatein kissi ke saath ki hongi.
Hmmm… Toh Delhi Belly dekhte hue itna kyun hass rahi thi aap?

Delhi Belly dekhegi Hindi mein, aur Sati Savetri banegi Suit aur Bindi mein.

Wah Hypocrite Bharatiyein naari, Wah!!!

10. Mein Ek Shareef Ladki Hoon : Hanji Mohtarma, mein bhi ek sareef ladka he hu. Mera ghar GB road par nahi hai.
There is a saying famous among boys, “Shareef toh gadhi bhi hoti hai”. Kindly ask your BF what does the saying means.

…. and the +1 thing which girls say often is …..

*Drum roll*

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 --> “I'm a VIRGIN”

OH LORD, KILL MEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!



                                                                                                                   - Jorawar Walia


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